My Journey On The Road
by Just-a-few-words
Summary: "Funny, I travel with two people and yet you are the only one with whom I'm talking." A little nothing shared by Jasper with his notebook.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer : Edward, Bella, and all things Twilight belong to SM.**

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Freedom

Our first day on the road, far from the sleepy suburban life.

Up to now, freedom had always seemed unattainable, something I could only fantasize about.

Now I'm going to experience it and, already, I feel exhilarated.

Goodbye Chicago.


	2. Chapter 2

I'm on the backseat, with Rosalie's head laying on my shoulder. She smells of sensuality and innocence. Strange mixture that only belongs to her.

She smells of Rosalie. I like it. I love her.

When Edward asks me "Where to?", I don't answer. I'm drowning in his twin sister's smell.

He won't care about my answer anyway.

He always do as he wants.

Edward always takes care of everything.

Edward always do as he wants.


	3. Chapter 3

Edward and Rosalie are arguing...again.

It could be annoying if it weren't so entertaining.

They are so used to getting anything they want...

They feel entitled to everything.

Back home, they fascinate as much as they are hated.

A renowned surgeon father, a stepford wife mother and their perfect beautiful children.

The perfect family.

On the surface.

The father is always absent.

The mother is an egocentric socialite who can't get through the day without her daily fix of Xanax.

And the children, who were adopted only because of their good looks, added to the family's magnificence.

Two evils hidden behind cherub faces. They are arrogant, egocentric, egoistical, sadistic, sociopaths...I could go on for hours.


	4. Chapter 4

Tease.

Rosalie always teases me.

With smiles, with looks, with small touches, with words...

She knows I'm in love with her.

She uses it. She uses me.

And I let her.

Edward looks at me with a mix of disdain and amusement through the rear-view mirror.

He shakes his head, mocking me.

Bastard.


	5. Chapter 5

They are arguing. Again.

Rosalie wants to go East and Edward West.

She demands a vote. She knows I'll say East like her.

I don't like being manipulated.

He wins.


	6. Chapter 6

I'm bored. So I write some words about me.

Collected. Blonde. 21. In love. Middle class. Drop out.

Mom would argue that there is more to say about me.

My father, however, wouldn't say a word.


	7. Chapter 7

I woke up with Rosalie kissing me.

I kissed her back. She backed away and laughed.

Edward laughed too and gave her a one hundred bill.

He calls me "Sleeping Beauty" now.


	8. Chapter 8

Rosalie is flirting with some guy.

Edward already left with a woman.

Rosalie leaves too. Finally.

Always the same routine. At every stop.

I'm alone and seek a blonde's company.

While Rosalie and Edward aren't picky ; for me, it's always blondes.


	9. Chapter 9

We are already out of money.

It's the twins' fault.

Those lazy fuckers.

They've never worked a day in their freaking life and are still not willing to.

And I sure as hell won't be the fool who'll work to support their asses.

We decided that Rosalie should call their father. He's more lenient with her.

Now, Edward and I both owe her.

She has the upper hand and she enjoys it.


	10. Chapter 10

We took two hitchhikers with us. Kate and Maggie.

Rosalie was pissed. She wasn't the only woman anymore.

The girls were fun. Especially Kate.

Beautiful smile. Sparkly eyes. Blond.

We flirted for a while.

I let her give me a hand-job with her friend asleep next to me.

When we were finished, I thanked her. Remnants of my education.

Rosalie glared at me though the mirror.

Edward snorted.

Guess we weren't discrete after all.

Our two companions left us at Denver, Colorado.


	11. Chapter 11

Edward is fuming.

Says that we won't wait for her any longer if she doesn't hurry.

I'm annoyed too. For other reasons.

But I'm appeased when I see her coming out of the gas station restroom.

Then I see some guy getting out after her. And I'm angry too.

She's really a slut sometimes.

I wonder what she gets out of it.


	12. Chapter 12

Rosalie left.

We crashed in a motel and she met some guy there.

She left with him.

And any hope I had to live something with her evaporated.

In spite of her being his sister, Edward doesn't seem to care.

He tells me to forget about her, that she's a slut and that she surely took after their mother.

He wouldn't know that anyway.

They were adopted.

They don't know their biological mother.


	13. Chapter 13

Edward is angry.

Angry because the car broke down.

Angry because the reparation will take days.

Angry because we barely have enough money to pay for it.

Since I know him, Edward has always been angry.

Against his biological parents, his adoptive parents, his sister, his teachers, his classmates...everyone and everything. Sometimes even against me.

To me, it's just sad.


	14. Chapter 14

Violet

Rosalie.

I dreamed about her last night...

We were on a beach. It was sunny.

She was sitting on the sand, her gaze turned toward the sea.

"Her hair shone like gold in the hot morning." as sang Manfred Mann.

She was wearing a violet dress.

She suddenly spun around, black glasses on.

I still remember that her eyes are a strange shade of violet though.

She smirked at me.

I woke up.

Edward smirked at me.

The same damn smirk.


	15. Chapter 15

Dry.

This is the only word coming to my mind as we drive through Phoenix.

This is the only word coming to my mind as I think about Rosalie's departure.

This is the only word coming to my mind as I think about the state of my heart.


	16. Chapter 16

Edward is stupid.

What he is doing is stupid.

Marrying a girl he's only known for a few days...

The mechanic's daughter, Bella. She's only 16.

Still...it's less stupid than loving a heartless slut.


	17. Chapter 17

Alone.

This is how I'm feeling as the newlyweds are christening the car.

They've gone at it ever since we went back on the road.

I'm sitting outside, hearing everything, concealing it to mind and imagining that one day it will be Rosalie and I.


	18. Chapter 18

Love

It must be the feeling that I see in Bella's eyes when she looks at Edward.

When I see the look in Bella's eyes when she looks at Edward, I wonder if I have the same when I look at Rosalie.

Does she love him like I love Rosalie?

No. Bella is just a sixteen-year-old starry-eyed girl.

And I like to think that I'm a realistic and mature guy.


	19. Chapter 19

Sitting in a booth of a shady club in downtown San Diego, I've been trying not to look at Bella.

She acts as if she didn't notice her husband leaving with a red head only minutes ago.

Edward went back to not being a one-woman-man.

I want to tell her that he has still managed to last two weeks.

But I don't have the heart to.

I hurt for her every time she smells other women on him, every time he disappears for hours, every time she irritates him (which she has clearly been doing more and more often these past few days).

I know she knows because I saw her blotchy eyes once.

She was still pretty even then.

For the first time, I felt a twinge of jealousy towards Edward.


	20. Chapter 20

Wet.

This is the state of my shirt as Bella is wiping her tears and snot on it.

After days of ignoring her, Edward left us yesterday.

No thank you, no goodbye...nothing.

He left with a blonde girl. Well, I think he left with her.

He's like Rosalie. An asshole.

It must run in their blood.

Abandon.

I wonder from whose side they got it : From their biological parents or their adoptive ones? From their mother's side or their father's?

Edward Sr, Elizabeth, Esme, Carlisle ; I guess the addition of fuck ups only results in fuck ups.

We don't have money...nor do we have a car.

We'll have to hitchhike.


	21. Chapter 21

I'm cold, Bella is too. I can feel her shivering in my arms.

We didn't find any place to sleep. We are on the streets.

I won't sleep tonight. Too dangerous.

Edward and Rosalie's hearts are cold.


	22. Chapter 22

Rosalie.

We came across Rosalie at a dinner in L.A.

She acted as if she hadn't seen us. I went to her nonetheless, Bella in tow.

She glared at the feminine figure standing beside me barely listening when I asked her about her brother's whereabouts.

She was too busy scrutinizing Bella.

She couldn't hide her surprised and pissed expression when she learned that Bella was her sister-in-law.

She just wanted us to leave her alone. Her man was coming back.

I asked her for money. She gave fifty. That'll be enough for now.

The man wasn't the one from the motel.

Slut.


	23. Chapter 23

It's such a pity that I fell for a girl like Rosalie, and Bella for a boy like Edward.

We are preys and they are our predators. They are predators and we are their preys.

We could be good for each other.


	24. Chapter 24

Hurt.

My eye still hurts even after Bella put a frozen steak on it so that it wouldn't swell.

I know she still feels guilty but I wasn't going to let that moron grope her.

While she was tending to me, I kept looking at the exposed flesh her riding shirt allowed me to see .

I wanted to touch it, to lick it.

See how it feels, how it tastes.

She must taste of sweetness because she is sweet, nice, pretty.

Rosalie is spicy. I already tasted her and my tongue is still burning.


	25. Chapter 25

Love

Was I mistaken?

I think I prefer warm to cold.

Sweet to spicy.

Brunette to blonde.

Bella to Rosalie.


	26. Chapter 26

We saw Rosalie today. Different guy, different look.

She took "pity" on us and gave us some dollars.

Bitch.

She didn't stop glaring at Bella. Guess she still doesn't approve of her brother's wedding.

She reluctantly gave away some information about Edward.

He's somewhere on the East Coast.

Back to Chicago?


	27. Chapter 27

Pregnant

She's pregnant.

I stole a maternity test in a drugstore today.

He should stayed with his wife, or worn condoms at least.

Better yet, not marry her at all.


	28. Chapter 28

I called mom today.

She thinks I'm coming back home so she sent me money.

I'm not.

Bella and I are still looking for Edward with Bella.

It'll surely be quicker to cross the U.S by train.


	29. Chapter 29

We are in the train. Bella's sleeping. I'm writing.

She's so beautiful.

I wonder what kind of father I would be.

I told Bella that we could go back to my parents and get married after she divorced him.

She refused.

But I know she'll soon come to her senses and accept.

He's not coming back. I know it.

We have been looking for him for almost a month now.


	30. Chapter 30

We found him in New York.

He is at James'. A somewhat friend.

Bella isn't aware of the fact that Edward has surely been with Victoria and the rest of the women who 'live' in this loft.

She is excited to see him again.

She is an idiot.

And I'm heartbroken.


	31. Chapter 31

Maria

Met her in a bar.

Brought me to her bed.

We stayed there for two days.

She's so warm. I want to stay here forever.

But her husband is going to come back soon from his trip.

I don't want to go back to the motel room where Edward and Bella are reacquainting themselves with each other.

My heart breaks when I hear them.


	32. Chapter 32

Edward is full of promises which Bella is eating up.

He says that he's going to ask his father to find him a job.

He says he wants a house full of children.

He says he loves her, that he regrets his actions.

He says a lot of things and she believes him.

She'll be disappointed.

He has never kept his promises.


	33. Chapter 33

They left and I'm again without a car.

Edward gave me money; but how long will it last?

Before they left, Bella hugged me and Edward glared as she did so.

Always angry.

Why would he be angry when she chose him over me.

When she is leaving me for him.

I'm depressed and alone.

I wonder if Maria is available.


	34. Chapter 34

I hitchhike to Rosalie.

She's married now. To a guy who's got nothing.

Nothing that I don't have anyway.

He doesn't seem smart. He is loud, has no money and can't stop calling her Rosie.

I saw her cringe each time.

She never dreamed of such a life, I'm sure.

Yet, she married him.


	35. Chapter 35

It was better than anything I had ever dreamed about.

Her and me together. Rosalie and Jasper.

She's not shy with her body. Takes what she wants.

The way she says my name...

Emmett is at work while I'm with his wife.

She seems to feel guilty afterward. So not Rosalie.

I would have preferred it to be Bella.

I'm such a masochist. Always wanting what I can't have.


	36. Chapter 36

I met a dark-haired girl.

Alice.

She was funny. Entertaining.

Not my type.

Because she wants me and I prefer when they don't. Or aren't available.

Like Rosalie and Bella.

It's nice feeling wanted though.

I'm gonna stay with her for a little while I think.


	37. Chapter 37

When I told Alice that I was leaving, she cried.

It warmed my heart to be wanted.

I cherished her tears.

I made "love" to her.

Slow and passionate.

She cried again but not from sorrow this time.

I gathered my clothes without bothering to look presentable.

She was looking at me. Wide and blue.

Before I reached the door, she called after me.

I had forgotten my cigarettes and she doesn't smoke.

Then I left.

Oddly enough, I feel kind of empty.

Not as empty as I felt when both Bella and Rosalie left me to live their lives.

But still empty.


	38. Chapter 38

Hey diary! It's been a long time.

Truthfully I don't really know how I got there.

I was once young and insouciant ; traveling all over the U.S and meeting all kind of people.

Now, I am a family man with a steady job, a mortgage to pay on my white picket fence house and a SUV.

I live the typical suburban life.

And I'm content with it.

I'm happy not to hear from the Cullens.

I'm happy for having come back to Alice.

I was happy when I first saw my children.

I'm happy when I get back from a tiring day at work and see Alice's smile or hear my kids' squeals.

I'm happy with my life.


End file.
